Boy 1, Boy 2, Girl

Boy 1 - Ohh, he's adorable. Funny how my friend has a thing for him and he doesn't like her. I think he might like me, but I don't know. He's cute, but probably not relationship worthy. But he still makes the list.

Boy 2 - Ohman. He is cute. Physically and mentally. Inside and out. He is a great guy. Mixed signals, too many of them. Oh, so many.

Girl - I like her. She likes me. My friends hate her. I hate her friends. I kind of want something to happen. But I don't wanna mess things up this weekend.

Maybe if I get past this party this weekend, then see what happens with the girl, maybe it will work. Maybe I can have my cake and eat it too. Maybe.

Overwhelmed

He said it better than I could. Stressed and overwhelmed. I'm finally in a good relationship; I'm not in love, but I'm happy. And now it's going down the shitter. Age is nothing. Work won't consume every ounce of time we have. There's too much. I can't deal with it all. I have to not only solve my problems, but all my friends. Because I care too goddamn much. I HAVE to make sure they're happy above my own happiness. Fuck this. He already saw my scars, why not add a few more? Whats one or two when there's already quite a few. Back to sanitarium, please. Lock me up.

In The Aeroplane Over The Sea

I'm getting more into indie and rap. Ask me why, I do not know. Mostly indie. But there is a new boy. Different from my old distraction, he was but a few days. We started as just hooking up but now we're together. I'm pretty optimistic about it. I don't need some immature highschooler. Good thing he's not in high school anymore. I'm pretty happy lately. Indie calms me. I like it.

A New One

She's way out of the picture. After five days. Her immaturity, not my own. But I'm way past that. I've got a new weakness. And damn, this boy's good. Let's hope I don't do something stupid. What a cute distraction.

How long does it take for scars to heal?

I don't need them to see these. The bleeding's gone down. But I still can't stop. I really hope they don't notice. This isn't their problem, only my own.

Fuck off

Don't confirm plans then break them a few fucking hours later without telling me. I called you 10 minutes before. I figured you were asleep so I called you a few more times. No answer. Went to your house. Of course, you're not there. What the fuck? I hope you have a good reason. Cuz I'm fucking pissed at you right now.

Unexpected

Answers in the variation of "yes" make me happy. Because that's what she said. [:

Girl #2

The younger one. She made me upset. But this new boy. He's turning things around a bit. I'm definitely not saying something will happen. But he's cute. And he's pretty funny. I like it.

Girls. My dad. Girls. My friends. Girls. Life.

My problems in a nutshell. She drives me crazy. They both do. I don't know what I want. I don't like anything right now. I'm just so apathetic about anything but school. Sometimes, I wonder if they care about me at all. It doesn't seem like it at all.
Oh, then there's him. I need him for money so I can't be an ass to him. I need money for DT and to help my mom. So, I have to be nice. I hate him. I wish he could go already.
It's not love, but I still hate it.
Are they real? Fuck if I know. Fuck them. But I need them.
NO!
Just kill me before I hurt someone.

My Life In A Song

RULES
1. Put Your itunes, windows media player etc on Shuffle
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS
4. Put any comments in brackets after the song name
5. Tag 6 people.


Are you male or female? Time Turned Fragile
Describe yourself. Detroit Rock City [that kind of makes sense]
What do people feel when they're around you? True Romance
Describe your current relationship. Miss Sobriety
Where would you like to be now? Irreplaceable
How do you feel about love? Boys and Girls [WOW!]
What's your life like? Ain't No Fun
What would you ask for if you had only one wish? Fake It....
Say something wise. Fall For You
If someone says "Is this ok?" you say: Best of Me
How would you describe yourself? Am I Ready?
What do you like in a guy/girl? All Over You
How do you feel today? Greener With The Scenery
What's the purpose of your life? Going To California
What is your motto? High [lawl]
What do your friends think of you? Cigaro [So they like my cock?]
What do you think of your parents? SOS
What do you think about very often? Hate [wow...]
What is 2+2? SOS [diff SOS]
What do you think of your best friend? Ready and Willing
What do you think of the person you like? Emergency
What's your life story? Vampire Heart
What do you want to be when you grow up? Billy's Got a Gun [LAWL]
What will you dance to at your wedding? Ghost Of You
What will they play at your funeral? Radio Ga Ga [damn, my funeral will be awesome]
What's your hobby? The Transition
What's your biggest fear? We're Not Gonna Take it
What's your biggest secret? Crank Dat Cavalry Boy [WOW}

A Girl With A Broken Heart

Love songs hang me. Couples stab me. She kills me. Make her stop. Make me stop. Make my heart stop. Just let me crawl into my own world where there is no such thing as unrequited feelings. Why do I let myself? Why do I fall for them so hard. This never happens. But I like her too much, it actually hurts. I just wanna sleep for the rest of this. Stop me before I try to fall off this world.

So I Took Another Chance

To ask another girl to dance. [: It rhymes and the chance worked out in my favor. So I have a date to homecoming now. So I'm happy for today. Things are working out well.

I Used To Be Concerned, now I'm Just Dissapointed

I've tried to convince her that what she's doing is disgusting and immature. I've told her time after time that I care about what she's doing and she still goes out there doing slutty things. I've just become disappointed in her. I've tried to talk her out of her habits but she just does not listen. She'll regret it when she's older.

When I Lose Myself, I Think Of You

She did it again. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I wanna run over there again. Make sure she's okay. I don't want to bother her.. I care about her too much. I don't know if that's good or bad. But I don't know much right now. Stop me before I go crazy.

Babygirl, Twist Away

Whenever I hear that song, I think of her. But even more important, the vice versa. When I think of her, her name, her face, it pops into my had. But not the regular Anthony Green version. It's the one she sings. With different accents on the wrong notes. And that's the one I like more. It's flawless and imperfection in one simple verse.

Step One, You Say, "We need to talk.."

I took a chance. again. It didn't work out. But oh well.

Baby Girl

Dear Anonymous, I think about you sometimes. But not in a romantic way. I just think of how you helped me. I thank you so much for what you've done. I wanna talk to you more often. You were a big part of my life.

Dear Anonymous, I hate you. Simple as that. I'm not going to miss you. not even a little.

Dear Anonymous, Just because I like other people doesn't mean I don't love you. I think I'll always love you. Probably because I haven't loved anyone else before. I've realized we'll probably never be together again and I'm okay with that. But I do still love you.

Dear Anonymous, I used to have a crush on you. But now, I just think of you as a friend. Though, we're hardly that. We don't talk very often. If I see you, I don't say hi. But whatever. I'm not going to make an effort with someone who makes none.

Dear Anonymous, Oh god. I like you. A lot. I'm sure you know. Sometimes, I wonder if you feel the same or if you're just flirty. I really think we could work. I don't know if you just don't like me or if it's her. I really like you two together... She just kind of treats you badly and it makes me upset. I hate knowing that you're crying about someone who should make you happy.

Dear Anonymous, I can't really tell if you dislike me or not. We hang out, but you don't talk much. Sometimes I wonder if you're mad at me because she said no to you.

Dear Anonymous, Thank god you don't say anything when I see you in the halls. I know you hate me, the feeling's mutual. But see, you hate me for no reason. But whatever, that's your deal.

Taste The Poison On Your Lips....

They break up. She's crying. I want to die.

Hearts Burst Into Fire

Great. They're fighting again. I hate it. She cries to me and there's nothing I can do about it. I want to help so badly. I really care about her happiness. There's only a few people who I can honestly say that about... I need to talk to her tomorrow.

You Keep On Sucking Me, Sucking Me In

Of course, as soon as I stop thinking about YOU, SHE starts making me like her more. God. I hate flirting with someone I have no chance with... She makes it so hard. Save me? I can't hide away in school. She's there too.

Jeez, I haven't blogged in forever...

And it's not a good blog.. I'm just upset, which is rare nowadays. But of course, we talk again and I fall in love all over again. Like I ever fell out of love? It's been a year. Why can't I get over this? My advice: never fall in love.  At least I had someone to talk to.. Thanks, Al. I just wish everything would be over. Maybe school will help....

Friendship Like This Is Rare

toriateyourfacee (10:46:51 PM): i have to peeeeeeeeee

toriateyourfacee (10:46:57 PM): but i dont want tooooooooooooo

LissaLoveXoX (10:47:03 PM): awh

LissaLoveXoX (10:47:08 PM): im sorry?

toriateyourfacee (10:47:12 PM): you should be

toriateyourfacee (10:47:15 PM): its all your fault

LissaLoveXoX (10:47:21 PM): again!? D:

toriateyourfacee (10:47:24 PM): you snuck into my bladder

LissaLoveXoX (10:47:29 PM): sorry!

toriateyourfacee (10:47:45 PM): well i know its soft but im watching a good movie! you couldnt wait?!

LissaLoveXoX (10:48:27 PM): no. its nice and warm there too. i was cold.

toriateyourfacee (10:48:37 PM): go to miami!

LissaLoveXoX (10:48:46 PM): your bladder was closer.

toriateyourfacee (10:48:51 PM): rofllllllllllllllllllll

toriateyourfacee (10:48:54 PM): were weird.

LissaLoveXoX (10:49:13 PM): mhm

toriateyourfacee (10:49:14 PM): and by we - i mean you

toriateyourfacee (10:49:22 PM): and by you, i mean the cookie monster

LissaLoveXoX (10:49:24 PM): and by you you mean you

LissaLoveXoX (10:49:26 PM): i mean

LissaLoveXoX (10:49:29 PM): i love cookies

LissaLoveXoX (10:49:33 PM): and making them

LissaLoveXoX (10:49:35 PM): especially

toriateyourfacee (10:49:36 PM): yeah

toriateyourfacee (10:50:07 PM): is there a difference between making cookies and making vegan cookies?

toriateyourfacee (10:50:22 PM): is making vegan cookies like gay sex?

LissaLoveXoX (10:51:01 PM): uummm...

LissaLoveXoX (10:51:02 PM): idk

LissaLoveXoX (10:51:09 PM): have we been having straight sex all along?

toriateyourfacee (10:51:15 PM): damn.....

LissaLoveXoX (10:51:22 PM): im sorry i just couldnt keep it away

toriateyourfacee (10:51:29 PM): -sighs-

LissaLoveXoX (10:51:31 PM): and by it i mean my massive cock

toriateyourfacee (10:51:33 PM): lissa.......

LissaLoveXoX (10:51:37 PM): sorry D:

toriateyourfacee (10:51:45 PM): i think we should make vegan cookies

LissaLoveXoX (10:51:56 PM): alright

toriateyourfacee (10:52:09 PM): -lion king rolling tackles into bedroom-

LissaLoveXoX (10:52:13 PM): xD

toriateyourfacee (10:52:16 PM): (:

LissaLoveXoX (10:52:20 PM): -makes vegan cookies all night long-

LissaLoveXoX (10:52:26 PM): -into the wee hours of the morning-

toriateyourfacee (10:52:32 PM): HAHAHAHAHA

toriateyourfacee (10:52:33 PM): wee.

LissaLoveXoX (10:52:37 PM): yes

toriateyourfacee (10:52:37 PM): like weewee

toriateyourfacee (10:52:39 PM): as in mydick

LissaLoveXoX (10:52:40 PM): no

LissaLoveXoX (10:52:42 PM): like frence

LissaLoveXoX (10:52:47 PM): as in yes

toriateyourfacee (10:52:48 PM): D: thats oui

LissaLoveXoX (10:53:03 PM): umm...no its not?

LissaLoveXoX (10:53:07 PM): i changed the frence language

toriateyourfacee (10:53:11 PM): oh okay

toriateyourfacee (10:53:21 PM): i see you changed the h to an e in french as well

LissaLoveXoX (10:53:35 PM): umm...yes?

toriateyourfacee (10:53:39 PM): got it.

toriateyourfacee (10:53:42 PM): what is dick?

LissaLoveXoX (10:53:49 PM): umm.....

LissaLoveXoX (10:54:48 PM): tori.

toriateyourfacee (10:54:52 PM): great.

toriateyourfacee (10:55:01 PM): i changed the spanishe language myself.

LissaLoveXoX (10:55:08 PM): really now

toriateyourfacee (10:55:10 PM): mhm

LissaLoveXoX (10:55:13 PM): to?

toriateyourfacee (10:55:22 PM): depends which word?

LissaLoveXoX (10:55:27 PM): dick

toriateyourfacee (10:55:32 PM): el dicko

LissaLoveXoX (10:55:37 PM): nice

LissaLoveXoX (10:55:49 PM): insert tab a into slot b please

toriateyourfacee (10:56:03 PM): oh what a lovely insertion

LissaLoveXoX (10:56:30 PM): would you insert your tab into my slot?

toriateyourfacee (10:56:38 PM): i would be delighted to

toriateyourfacee (10:56:50 PM): -inserts tab-

LissaLoveXoX (10:57:01 PM): -slotogasms-

toriateyourfacee (10:57:44 PM): this army tank looks rather suggestive.

toriateyourfacee (10:57:56 PM): theres a rather large........... cannon protruding from it

LissaLoveXoX (10:58:18 PM): sorry. they wanted to put me in the movie really badly. it was the only role available

toriateyourfacee (10:58:35 PM): you look quite darling

LissaLoveXoX (10:58:44 PM): thank you I try

heartbreak

Just got done crying my eyes out. I'll probably start again when I put my laptop down. 320 days. 320. I don't know if that's a lot or a little. It was enough to make this big of an impact on me. It's taking a lot for me not to walk into the kitchen and stab what's already been stabbed so many times - yet this time it'd be intentional. I don't know what to do or say anymore... I don't know how I'm going to act normal around people. The ring would've looked great on your finger...

tori is one of those blondes dreams are made of

Go to Googlism.com and type in your name. Make sure "who" is selected. Post the best ones. 

tori is outrageous

tori is in the anniversary issue of spin which i just got in the mail about 3 mins ago

tori is totally adorable
tori is nothing short of phenomenal
tori is
tori is my little yorkie

tori is commonly known in the usa as a cape parrot

tori is a normal slow bone growth that appears in the upper and the lower jaw
tori is their youngest and was diagnosed with microphthalmia with a large cyst in the left eye
tori is currently on the european leg of her world tour
tori is featured on the cd single by tom jones "i wanna get back with you"
tori is extremely excellent in this book
tori is mature in age at 36 years of age with a body any girl half her age would be proud of
tori is again in a white room
tori is just fake

tori is god

STOP IT!

Why?! Why why why why why. This isn't fair! It's like an invasion - only one thats been taking place for almost a year now. A year, babe. You've been driving me crazy for an entire year. Do you remember when we met? I do... It was quite funny. Then, I dated Becca because I thought I could never have a chance with you. She's a great girl - but she never compared to you. Eventually I got the guts to ask you out. And you said no. And that totally crushed me until literally about five minutes later you changed your mind and instantly made me the happiest girl alive. I remember when you went to cape cod for a few days and I commented you at least once every day on mibba. I fell for you fast and hard. I remember the day of our one month. We had a really serious talk and I broke down and cried my heart out with Alana right next to me because I knew you were going to break up with me and that totally threw my heart in the trash. The next day, you broke up with me. I cried even more. I didn't talk to anyone. I dated other people - no one lasting more than a month. Yet, no one could compare to you. I held everyone way up to a higher standard just because they weren't you. In January, I thought I was over you. We hadn't been talking much and I was "relieved" to not be in love with you. Then we started talking a lot again and I crashed. I realized I never did stop loving you. I still haven't. You're the only thing on my mind; you're all I talk about. Whenever I close my eyes, all I can see is holding you, kissing you, running down the streets of Colonie laughing and skipping and holding hands. That's the only way I want it to be. I wish. I like my dreamland better than real life. Because you're my drug. My addiction. 1 pill, I'm dizzy. 2, I'm laughing. 3, I'm breaking down. 4, 5, 6, all I want is more. More. More. More. I say I want you to be happy - I do. But more than that - I want you to be mine. Mine and only mine. Forever and for always. But I know that chance is small. But love can last through anything. Anything at all, I'll endure it for you. Even if we have more fights than the world has had wars, I will move there. I will find you. I'm still even debating whether or not to post this. You already know how much I do love you. But I bet you think I'm nuts - even more so because of this. Well, I'd agree with you there, darling. I'm the craziest damn girl you'll ever meet.

Fourth of fuck fifth day

So yesterday ROCKED. Vicki and Alana came over and we partied it up. I love them so much. We went to the school hung with Jarrell and went to 7-11 and came back. It was fun. And we did make-up and hit and made Vicki's make-up all funky. Yeah, we ended up going to sleep at like six in the morning and woke up at two. It's been pretty good up until now. We want to go to my summer house but we have to wait til eight so Alana's sister can come get us and my mom won't stop bitching at me for no reason. Also, we had to pull together $35 - most of which in change. So yeah I'm about to flip shit. The only thing keeping me calm is Alana and Vicki.

I Love

this. being optimistic. life. sodapop (not from the outsiders!). the twilight series. vampires. literature. math. english. computers. music. concert band. marching band. piano. cello. clarinet. guitar. trombone. people who are funny. talkative people. people who are there for me. friends. making a scene. throwing pickles. mall cops (but not really). people who like politics. donnie darko. frank. avenged sevenfold. telling people when i have to go to the bathroom. arbys. being vegan. peta2. people immature enough to call me "peta dyke". warped tour. you.

I Can't Stand

homophobes. people who think they're the shit. whiners. emos. preps. labels. people who are exactly like me. annoying people. people who like screamo just to be cool. norma jean. fakes. liars. stupid people. people who treat animals like shit (verbally/physically). science. pointless rap. people who don't like classic rock or old music. people who look awful in braces (j.w.). people who believe in global warming. people who think they're too "good" or "popular" to talk to people "lower" than them. whores. christianity (not christians). old perverts. rapists. my chemical romance. michigan. the fact that i don't live in new york. being young. people who try to convert me to other religions. people who think wiccans are crazy. people who tell me i'm wrong when im right. you.

Sex Gods

(1) List 5 celebrities you would have sex with without even asking questions.
(2) Put all of them IN ORDER of your lust for them. (5 - 1, 1 is the hottest.)
(3) Say which movie/show/thing it was that hooked you.
(4) Supply photos for said people.

5.

Joey Jordison

(Slipknot)

........WOW. Even before I saw him without his mask I wanted to freaking TACKLE him.

4.

Ville Valo

(HIM)

This picture, his voice, his hottnes - 'nuff said.

3.

Novak

(Viva La Bam)

What can I say? I like badasses. He'd be number 2 if I wasn't afraid of STDs.

2.

Jimmy Urine

(Mindless Self Indulgence)

Mostly for his lyrics. :P But he's pretty freakin' hot.

1.

Synyster Gates

(Avenged Sevenfold)

-faints- Do I need an explanation?! He's like the sexiest thing on the face of the Earth. ;ldkkflwfl He's Synyster Gates - sex god of the universe!

Family fuck up

You don't get it! You don't get why I get so angry with you. Why I scream my lungs out and you just call me a potty-mouth and childish. You get everything. And it's not fair. You have everyone liking you, all the talent, everyone telling you how amazing you are. Call it jealousy, I don't care. I'd just prefer not being called a worthless, stupid, lazy bitch while he just refers to you as the prodigy. It's not fair. We do everything the exact same way, you just happen to get drum major and be an amazing pianist. I'm actually smarter than you, no one ever recognizes it. When they do, you just say they're lying. She likes you better, I know. I've come to accept that, but it doesn't I  like it. Why am I the one with the scars while you get off clean? Family fuck-up - that's me.

What am I doing?

I waste my time with other guys and girls, thinking that maybe I can fall in love again. I'm wasting my time and my life away with you. I date random people who I have very small interest for and end up dumping them less than a month later. I try to distract myself from you and it never works. I love you, you love him, he's just a dick. You've fallen for that and I know you can't help it. I just wish you could get away from the trap he's holding you in. I want you to find someone - anyone - who treats you like how you deserve to be treated. I don't care if it's me as long as they make you happy. I'll still move there if you want me to. That's always been in my plan. If you don't - tell me. I'll cross it out in a second. I'll move halfway across the Earth. You're my biggest weakness. Tell me to do something and I would. I'd kill someone for you, dear. And I've run out of options. I almost considered suicide. That's been decided against but I don't know what to do. I love you. I love you. I love you. I don't know what I'm supposed to. What do you want?! I'm going crazy. Lock me up. Put me in the asylum. It'd be the best for us.