I Feel Like I'm Annoying Him

But I know that's not true. I just think about him constantly. I'm annoying myself, that's all. I'm freaking out because he hasn't called. Tell me that's not crazy.

Every time I try to fly I fall. Without my wings, I feel so small. I guess I need you, baby. And every time I see you in my dreams, I see your face, it's haunting me. I guess I need you, baby.

Not to mention, he's changed so much. He's so.... good now. He's sweet and funny and the way he talks.. It's so different. What he said to me changed my feelings completely. I guess I did miss him.... I wish I would've said that instead of "I don't know."

And by the way,

Him. Ugh, how he kills me. "We'll never see each other. I have school and work. I'm sorry. I think we should break up." Months ago, but the words strike again. I told her to call him, forgetting he had night school during that time. He answered. No more school, eh? Someone else brought him up. They hung out more than a few times in a week. No more work, eh? You're a liar. But I can't get over it. It wasn't love. But I sure as hell liked you a lot. I trusted you more than the rest of them. Let you into my mind and my heart. I let you do what I never let others do before. Now, no one really matters. A kiss here, a make out there. Why should I care? I feel like I should call you. Maybe see if you wanna hang. Maybe we can go back to before you asked me out. In the basement? We had fun with no strings attached. I'm sure that's what you wanted. Maybe you still do. I'll find out soon. My friends will kill me.

My Best Friend's Boyfriend

How fucking typical. Ugh. At least she's not really my best friend. But still a good one. It's not so crazy of an idea. I mean, I've known him so much longer. I hang out with him almost every single day of my life. She never sees him. He talks about me all the time. He tells his best friend to call me so we can hang out. What in the world. I even took one of those crazy compatibility quizzes. It said we were absolutely perfect for each other. All based on names and personalities. What the fuck. I don't trust those things 100% but really. I tried it with me and different someone and we just got something about having the same sense of humor. Someone slap me. I call myself crazy. But even my best friend in the whole world says he likes me. Hell, she knew I liked him before I did. She says he talks about me all the time. And that he flirts with me 24/7. Am I crazy? Or is there a chance? Someone shoot me before I do something moronic. Like me, hate me, love me, destroy me.