STOP IT!

Why?! Why why why why why. This isn't fair! It's like an invasion - only one thats been taking place for almost a year now. A year, babe. You've been driving me crazy for an entire year. Do you remember when we met? I do... It was quite funny. Then, I dated Becca because I thought I could never have a chance with you. She's a great girl - but she never compared to you. Eventually I got the guts to ask you out. And you said no. And that totally crushed me until literally about five minutes later you changed your mind and instantly made me the happiest girl alive. I remember when you went to cape cod for a few days and I commented you at least once every day on mibba. I fell for you fast and hard. I remember the day of our one month. We had a really serious talk and I broke down and cried my heart out with Alana right next to me because I knew you were going to break up with me and that totally threw my heart in the trash. The next day, you broke up with me. I cried even more. I didn't talk to anyone. I dated other people - no one lasting more than a month. Yet, no one could compare to you. I held everyone way up to a higher standard just because they weren't you. In January, I thought I was over you. We hadn't been talking much and I was "relieved" to not be in love with you. Then we started talking a lot again and I crashed. I realized I never did stop loving you. I still haven't. You're the only thing on my mind; you're all I talk about. Whenever I close my eyes, all I can see is holding you, kissing you, running down the streets of Colonie laughing and skipping and holding hands. That's the only way I want it to be. I wish. I like my dreamland better than real life. Because you're my drug. My addiction. 1 pill, I'm dizzy. 2, I'm laughing. 3, I'm breaking down. 4, 5, 6, all I want is more. More. More. More. I say I want you to be happy - I do. But more than that - I want you to be mine. Mine and only mine. Forever and for always. But I know that chance is small. But love can last through anything. Anything at all, I'll endure it for you. Even if we have more fights than the world has had wars, I will move there. I will find you. I'm still even debating whether or not to post this. You already know how much I do love you. But I bet you think I'm nuts - even more so because of this. Well, I'd agree with you there, darling. I'm the craziest damn girl you'll ever meet.