That I crave love. I guess so does everyone. But I so desperately want to love and be loved. Every second of everyday. Unconditionally. I think about it all the time. Will I fall in love again? Soon? Or years from now? I realize I'm still young and I probably shouldn't even know what love is. But I have. And I want to again. I almost need to.
But I fear it just as much. I fear the commitment. The devotion. The drama. What happens with heartbreak? Will I be able to go through that again? It was so hard last time. It took me almost two years to mostly get over it. I'm so scared to fall in love again. So much that I've sabotaged every relationship afterwards until now. I'm not good at protecting myself. I'm always gonna get hurt. But that hard... I don't know.
I'm just confusing myself so much. And I don't know what to do. Well, I have a clue. But I'm just a moron. I'll probably fuck this up. So in advance, I'm sorry.
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